***This post is an answer to something in the comments section of yesterday's post, What Will We Do With It?  Please read that first, in order to understand this response. ***

<<<<Just a question for you women without sounding silly or naieve. I'd like to get an idea of your day without tv. I know this sounds ridiculous. But I come from a family of non-Christians and was raised on radio and tv. I guess I'd like to know what your day is filled with doing? When your husbands come home from work, how do they relax? What do you do together when they come home at night? A couple more questions come to mind. The internet has alot of the same things as TV does, how do you filter all of that? We have a presidential election coming up. How do you research the candidates? The computer? The Library? Do you even involve yourself with voting?>>>>

Let me begin by assuring you that you do not sound silly or naive. You sound like a person who has lived so long one way that you cannot imagine life another way. You sound like a person who has been indoctrinated by 'the world' to hate silence. You are expressing the typical Western mindset of our day. I too, was raised in an ungodly home with all forms of media blaring morning, noon and night. I remember summer vacation from public school being a blur of HBO and MTV. I also remember wondering how I would ever live without them. You, my dear, are not alone.
 
Next, I do not believe you really want to know about my day ~ it is filled to capacity with homeschooling seven children, running a farm, cooking from scratch, etc., and I am at a point where I now wonder how people have time to watch television. I am on the other side of the spectrum from where you are now (and where I once was). I believe that what you are truly wondering about is what in the world YOUR day would be like without television/radio/etc. So I will attempt to answer from that perspective.

The first two questions are quick and easy to answer:

Internet is a tool that we have weighed and found to be enough of a benefit to our family that we allow it here. Not by default, "because everyone has one", but because we believe it to deliver a net gain (and not all technology does). Our computer is a servant for us to use, we are not at it's mercy.

• Our computer is double-filtered with Norton and BSafe filtering software, therefore, opportunities for evil uses of our computer have been greatly diminished.

• All adults in our family know how to examine the history files of internet use, and further, Bsafe keeps a back-up record of the same.

• Time limits, strictly adhered to, are a help if amount of time spent online is a concern.  Accountability is also a helpful tool. .

• We have our home page set to Blank, instead of AOL, MSN, or any other "news" sites. 

• Our children do not go online alone. Ever. Period. We are sitting with them at the computer screen at any time they are online.

• We do not allow the internet to be a "boredom buster". We don't go there just because there isn't anything else to do.

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Often we are met with incredulity from folks who find out that we have no television reception in our home, we do not listen to the radio, nor do we take the newspaper. Exactly two seconds before the revelation, had you asked one of these people if we seemed backwards, uninformed or out-of-touch with what is happening in the world, they would have answered, "No, of course not". Yet, immediately after discovering this fact about us, they ask, "Well, how do you keep up with what is happening in the world?"

Mr. Visionary, when faced with this challenge, will often ask a person to name five things (non sports-related) that they saw on the news last night, then to explain how their life profitted from acquiring that information. They cannot answer. When we discovered many years ago that we couldn't answer either, we purposely stepped out of the world of media influence. I remember the day I found out that Diana, Princess of Wales died ~ it was on the one year anniversary of the date. On September 11, 2001, I awoke after being up all night at the ER with Napoleon, to a call from a girlfriend about the morning's events. The first time I ever saw footage of the attacks was eight months later on a PBS documentary. I will make a bold statement here, that I believe my life is the better for not having been bombarded with the images of it at the time.

Last night, I could see in Mr. Visionary's eyes that something had happened during the day. Having to be out in the world four days a week, he is not as insulated from the media as me. Events at Virginia Tech hit fairly close to home for us ~ several family members claim it as their alma mater, and Mr. Visionary and I tell the children of our (mis)adventures spelunking in the caves around Blacksburg while dating.  When he showed me an online news article about the murders, my first thought was, "I wonder who will be sent over the edge by watching this?" Judge me if you must, but my first thought was not about the victims of the first crime, the murders, but the victims of the second crime, the besieging of homes with the images of the event.

As much as I desire to sermonize the effects of media overload (and I may one day), and fuss about it's resetting the shock and moral acceptability threshold, I will refrain and ask an important question. When assailed with the images, soundbites and emotional hoopla of the news...what will you do with the information? What is your plan for effecting change in regards to that which you are watching? My intention is not to be fatalistic, just realistic. To quote Neil Postman from his book Amusing Ourselves to Death, "In both oral and typographic cultures, information derives its importance from the possibilities of action. Of course, in any communication environment, input (what one is informed about) always exceeds output (the possibilities of action based on information). [snip] Thus, we have a great loop of impotence: the news elicits from you a variety of opinions about which you can do nothing except to offer them as more news, about which you can do nothing. "

At best, we can determine to pray for the families involved, for the police and for the students. But will we? Would it even be any more effective than, "God bless those strangers"? At worst, we will do nothing  ~ acting in complete apathy as if we had no knowledge of the tragedy. Somewhere in the middle is that state of fearful worry and helpless despair that dishonors our Father. By our willing involvement in the world of media, we allow it to dictate to us what our emotions should be. The television tells us when to be sad, when to despair, when we should feel guilty for our better circumstances. Why else would we "need" up-to-the-minute reporting if not to hold us spellbound in emotional upheaval?

I submit that, assuming we are even aware of the news, (which I am unwilling to concede is a need), it would be better to allow the Holy Spirit (rather than the news anchors) to lead us into action or intercession. Information for the sake of information is lunacy.  Knowing about all the problems in the world when you are incapable of changing them is a recipe for emotional turmoil. Yes, we need to be aware of the needs around us ~ for the sake of ministry. But when we know more about the war across the world than the needs across the street, why do we wonder at the sorry state of the world? We must be selective about where we spend our emotional and physical energy as well as our time.

Daniel prophesied that, in the last days, "...many shall run to and fro, and knowledge shall increase" (Daniel 12:4), and Proverbs warns about curiosity in that, "Death and destruction are never satisfied, and neither are the eyes of man" (27:20). My belief is that these verses apply to this state of media overload in which we live. It is always good to recognize where Scripture speaks to us. 

The question is, "What will we do with it?"

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Apparently efficiency has no relevance anymore. Effectiveness as well, has left the building.The concept that the Lord has methods rather than just loosely defined principles is no longer accepted, either.  From all appearances they have gone to the far country, never to return. They have been replaced by a new creature called simply, "ministry".

Let's think this through a bit with a few real life examples that I have experienced.  

A single Mom I knew needed clothes for her children, a saving relationship with Jesus, and similarly, a friend and mentor. Four women discussed her situation, gossiped, decided to clean out their attics, sell their kids clothes at a yard sale, donate the proceeds to their church, then have the church cut the woman a check so that she could "buy her kids clothes". In this process, four separate women spent four days each cleaning out kids clothes, pricing items, making signs, and having a yard sale. By the end, they were exhausted, their families missed them, and they had pizza delivered because they were too busy "doing ministry" to make dinner.  Since the church mailed the check, there was no interaction, no gospel, no encouragement for a weary Mom, no friend, no mentor.  The surprise about why the Mom didn't come visit the church "after all they'd done for her" was shocking.

May I submit that if the Lord's methods were employed, efficiency and effectiveness would have gone hand in hand? Might I suggest that we just pack up the clothes, take some cookies and coffee over to the Mom, and share with her not only the clothes we have, but our relationship with our Lord?  Perhaps I am being too simplistic?

How about this one?  (Please forgive me if I rant.) Say the Lord gives you a heart to help young women with eating disorders. And say you have a friend that, after adopting a child from an unwed mother, desires to help unwed mothers. Following the world's plan for "ministry", the next logical step would be to enlist a board of directors, start a non-profit corporation, buy a 1.3 million dollar 49 acre, 9500 square foot property, and begin to drum up funds to "start a ministry". Buying high-dollar designer clothing and jewelery at wholesale to resell would be a great way to make money for your ministry. Encourage donors that their names would be printed in "all appropriate literature",  and engraved on the obligatory brick  to line the front Gratitude Walkway. When the funds are ready, acquire a full-time staff to include round-the-clock doctors and counselors, and the necessary food service, cleaning , grounds maintenance and administrative staff. With the whole 9500 square feet, you would be able to maintain a 12 bed facility. Think of it: twelve young women at one time would be "ministered to". All this for only 50 billion man-hours and a multi-million dollar budget each year. Incredible. This must be God.

While I remove my tongue from my cheek, please consider whether there might be a better way. Has anyone ever heard of, "He setteth the solitary in families"? Someone dear to me recently shared about this new ministry started by some mutual acquaintances and was perplexed over my quizzical stare. I was dumbfounded, and still am.

Is it just the uneducated side of me that thinks that these situations could be more lovingly and effectively handled within the context of a family taking in an unwed mother, allowing her to share in family life,  learning about how healthy families relate, learning child care...being loved?  I understand that the average family may not know how to handle eating disorders and counseling ~ but they could drive her somewhere, and they could listen. Simpler is better. God is not the author of bureaucracy. When the Lord gives us a burden for something, perhaps He wants us to personally do something about it.

That is, if we aren't too busy doing ministry.

[End of rant. We will now return to the regularly scheduled (but not regularly updated) blog.]

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I love free advice. Especially when it comes to infants. All those folks who bombard me kindly offer and explain the 'proper method' for raising a baby do me a great service. I imagine they have no idea what a valuable commodity their words of wisdom have become in our life.

I do not actually follow their advice of course. I am fairly picky about my sources. Unless it is basic Biblical principles being shared, I just smile sweetly and thank the offerer kindly, promising to "remember that". In cases of methodology, I do not take advice from anyone with fewer or younger children than my own. Nothing personal, but when I do more laundry in a day than an advisor does in a month, their advice is less-than-helpful.

Besides, if after seven times I have not figured it out, there is obviously a learning curve too steep to for me to surmount, and the advice would be wasted anyway.

Just this week I was encouraged to, "Give dat baby a sucker and strap her in a highchair". The fact that "dat baby" is only three weeks old and cannot hold up her own head is apparently irrelevant. I also have, in the past, been urged to give a 2 month old infant a chicken bone to gnaw on. My Grandfather swore that he always did that with my Dad, and that he turned out fine. The whole thing sounds way too similar to that 'Your-Dad-Has-Brown-Hair-Because-Of-A-Diaper-Accident-While-I-Was-Busy-Watching-Football' story. No thanks, Pop.

All this great advice could be a product of simple geography. Where else but in the Southern U.S. might I find a young mother to assure me that a slice of fatback was by far the most effective pacifier for a little one? I get a little weak in the stomach just remembering the end of a jiggly white slab rhythmically moving on her toddler's lips. But she was right-revolting as it was, it did appear to be a good pacifier.

To alleviate any guilt I might otherwise feel from not putting into practice any of these sage approaches, I utilize the words of wisdom in other ways. Whenever we need some stress relief, or someone is crying, all I need to do is whisper to Mr. Visionary that somebody needs to get that child a chicken bone. The snickering over the chicken bone (and retching over the fatback) lightens the mood tremendously. I told you they were a valuable commodity-we just added to our family repertoire of 'inside jokes'.  

Now we can prove two scripture verses in one fell swoop."Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counselors there is safety" Proverbs 11:14. "A merry heart doeth good like a medicine" Proverbs 17:22.

Did I mention I love free advice?

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