HAPPY 5th BIRTHDAY ELLIE

Five years ago this morning I was holding my very first baby girl.  We were all alone, John was in Afghanistan as Ellie was born 2 1/2 months after 9/11.  She came very quickly so my mom did not make it in time.  It was just she and I.  I remember when I first went in to labor and then went to the hospital and realized she was coming and thinking that there was no way that I could do this on my own.  (I did have a neighbor there)  I was so scared and lonely for John, I began praying for peace and Jesus brought it to me and really I did not do it on my own, He was there and Ellie was doing her part to be born too.  I pushed very little and she came out just 26 minutes after I got to the hospital and only 3.5 hours after my water broke.  As I sat with her the first morning after she was born, I asked myself, how can I do this alone, I have no idea when John will be home, I am all alone with this new baby, I asked Jesus for peace and He gave it to me, we made it through those first four months alone just fine until John came home.  I had to daily ask for peace as Ellie was not the easiest baby, but Jesus was faithful to give it to me each day.  I was not alone, He was there and so was Ellie, teaching me about herself and her needs.  Life is like that, even with John home now, there are times as a mom I feel so alone, like I carry the burdens of parenting this little person alone and it is at those times that I know that I need to go to the feet of my father and give him my precious Ellie, he gives me peace, he tells me I am not alone.  He is there, he has given me a wonderful partner in my husband and he has given me a wonderful little girl who is with me and teaches me more about herself and life in general than just about anyone.  Ellie is not easy.  If you look at the definition of strong willed in the dictionary you will see her beautiful face!  She is a challenge to raise but she also brings me an incredible amount of joy.  I am so thankfull to be her mommy!!  I am honored to be her mommy!