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Part 3- CTBHHM- The Changes.

This is the third installment of a 3 part posting. Please go here for part 1 and here for part 2.
Already, Mr. Steady and I are noticing wonderful new changes. We feel closer now than we ever have (and dear one, we’ve always been a very close couple) and are seeing God controlling my anger and frustrations to levels I have never been able to ever attain. We see God gifting me with a patience and level of compassionate understanding that I was quite incapable of before. We see a family now living on a much more even keel- experiencing less and less major highs and lows. God has kept my mouth shut on many occasions and infractions that would have in the past been major are now minor and not worth noting. Past hurts that I would have dwelled on and used as kindling for starting new fires have faded away to nothing.
It is nothing short of glorious what God is doing. On the book’s cover- under the title is this phrase “Discover how God can make your marriage glorious”. I am so glad I ignored what others had to say (others who I normally agree with in many ways) and following my doubting ways, bought this book. God can truly make your marriage glorious. Of that I have no doubt. You will find, however, that as the wife you must give more and expect less. Not fair I know, but I doubt it’s exactly fair or that we are deserving of the blessings, grace and mercy God is ready to heap upon us. There is no such thing as equal sacrifice (hello? No one can equal God giving His perfect son!!!). I have always been disgusted by life’s unfairness but I can’t help but think of all those years I wasted thinking more along the lines of what was fair and just and missed out on so many blessings. Oh, the high costs I didn’t know I was paying because I believed in equality, equal footing, equal responsibility, equal division of labor etc. I see mounds of prettily wrapped up presents, all blessings, that I walked right past over the years in my quest for equality. I believe I lost out on many blessings because of my desires for my Dearest to value me for all my hard work, to show me that value and to output just as much as I felt I was. In truth, I was being quite unfair to him. Shame on me.
Now that my eyes have been opened it is unfortunate for me and my personality that I have looked and seen where other women close to me are lacking. I desire to pass this book around to some ladies I know but I won’t. First they must have a teachable spirit- if their heart isn’t open to learning and change then this book will be no help to them and in fact, may do more harm. And so when these women pop into my head or I hear them whining/complaining talking about their marriages and find myself about to comment (remember that I have that malady of foot-in-mouth syndrome- one of the symptoms being the act of saying exactly what you think before you temper it . . . .) I instead lift up a prayer and remind myself that I too was once quite ignorant of God’s plan for wives/help meets.
So I pray. I pray for God to grant me the opportunities to speak about the difference He has made in me and for him to guide my words as I speak them. I pray that I would live it out right in front of them. I pray for those women I know who are heavy on my heart, whose marriages are in turmoil, I pray that their hearts would be softened and become teachable; I pray that they would become miserable in their desire for fairness/justice and seek instead the blessings of submission to the Lord and to become the help meet God intended.
Perhaps you are such a woman. Please know that I am praying for you.