Home Sweet Simple Home

Pulling into Frustration Station

I am currently fighting a growing frustration.
My frustration is with email. I am amazed at the amount of “between the lines” reading that can go into email and the trouble it causes.
I have learned, with some job/ministry related emails to say a prayer before even opening them.
Sometimes I feel like opening my email is like walking through a mine field- some days I make it through alright and other days . . . . .
Boom!
Ker-blooie!
So I pray when I get emails from certain people and I pray when I read the emails and I pray when I am forming my replies and I pray when I hit “send”.
I think to myself that I do not want to perpetuate the frustration they are making me feel. I work hard to answer the email words not the tone.
And there are times when I fail to make that happen. Times when what I perceive to be the “tone” of an email pushes my hot button down so far that I don’t think it will ever pop back up.
Some emails I do not reply to right away- I have walk away, think about it, pray about it- talk it over with Mr. Steady.
Email can be an ugly thing.
I often find myself saying to Mr. Steady, “Does so-and-so think or proof read before sending emails? Does so-and-so have any idea how they come off in this email?”
Or “Boy, I wish so-and-so understood how their emails made me feel- I wonder if they would continue?”
Unfortunately for me I do not feel that I can speak to the two biggest so-and-so’s who send me frustrating emails.
Right now it seems that the frustrating emails are job/ministry related but in the not-so-distant past there were frustrating, confusing and misunderstood emails within a group I belong to.
I know there is email etiquette but how many people use it? It is so very VERY easy to whip off an email to someone- and very tempting to do it when you are mad/angry/frustrated and want to share all your thoughts without someone butting in- you have your say, your rant in all it’s glory.
Email is easier than phoning. Email is easier than face-to-face. But I’ve learned that it is not better. There are times we take our rants too far in emails and do irreparable damage. Yes, I know this for certain. I’ve been on both ends of the rant and no lasting good comes from it.
I often hear myself mumbling that the emailer is too narrow-minded. Can’t they see it from another point of view, I ponder. Like mine? Don’t they know that a little sugar with a complaint makes it easier to swallow?
Does anyone keep “some thoughts” to themselves?
Benjamin Franklin is quoted as saying, “A slip of the foot you may soon recover, but a slip of the tongue you may never get over.”
and
“Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.”
And here is something I wrote down in my quote journal and try to remind myself of when I wallow in frustration and more- just like this.
Its alright to sit on your pity pot every now and again. Just be sure to flush it when you are done.

Untitled Comment

1:54 PM, 2008-Oct-8 .. Posted by Lynne

Amy,
I think a lot of the problem of email vs. talking in person is that we are used to getting visual feedback when we talk in person. You can see the person's body and facial reactions in person, and you adjust your message accordingly. Email is impersonal. Email also never goes away, it can be forwarded to multiple others, and you do have to be very careful.

Lynne

2:56 PM, 2008-Oct-8 .. Posted by YPAmy5

Oh I agree.
I'm sure if some people could see my reaction to the stuff their sending they may rethink it. That's the great thing about face-to-face communcation- you can stop mid-sentence and change direction by reading facial and body cues.
This keeps you from digging a larger hole than necessary. LOL

Untitled Comment

3:48 PM, 2008-Oct-8 .. Posted by sweetie

It must be in the air today, frustration, disappointment, guilt perhaps.....for me I feel like I have done 1,000 things wrong today, yet I know I am forgiven and I know it will be better, and I know God is God and He is in control....but it seemed every corner was a roadblock to a better day today. I will pray for you my friend, that joy and peace return today.
hugs
Sweetie