Heritage Farm

How do you know your a " Countrygirl"...

1. Perhaps, your children say YAS um , instead of YES mam....
2. When your livingroom carpet could grow the next garden.... I am teasing its not that bad...
3. When you would rather hang laundry , then use the dryer.
4. When writing real letters to your closest kindred spirits, beats emails...
5. When you love sewing your own clothing, instead of buying from LLBean, Lane Bryant or the like.
6. When denim is your favorite color.
7. When you grow your own food and can it yourself , instead of stocking up at Save-A-Lot.8. When making your own Bread from Scratch and Knead it yourself, instead of letting a bread machine do the fun stuff.
9. When waiting the hour or more for bread to raise is used to take time out to read to your children or pray.
10. When you know that all things Depend on God...The weather, A healthy Birth, A Happy Family...
11. When having over family means the joy of cooking a huge meal and also hearing the complements afterwards...
12. When your children play outside for hours instead of watching a TV set.
13. When you can remember all the old skits on Hee Haw....
14. When your favorite song, speaks of family, harvest or Tractors...
15. When the words "being in a pickle" ... means your in big trouble....
16. When going to bed at the end of a long day is heavenly bliss...
17. When the smell of fresh clean babies and diapers is wonderful and cherished.
18. When wearing bib's , doesn't mean to get the babies ready for dinner...
19. When hearing the rooster crow at 5am and seeing the sun dawning is
joyful...
20. When milking the goat , laying your head on her flank and feeling her warmth (especially in mid winter) you find peaceful time alone with the Lord and are oh so greatful for a moment of silence and contentment.
21. When the love , care and happiness of your husband, children and family and friends is the most important thing in your life...

I am sure there is alot more things that make us a " Countrygirl " perhaps you can add a few to the list... ( feel free to add in the comments section) Some are funny, some are just pure joy...

I today feel so glad that the Lord has made me a "Countrygirl" and that
I can do all the above and enjoy it.

The Coffee Of Life

A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together
to visit their old university professor. Conversation soon turned
into complaints about stress in work and life.
Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and
returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups -
porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some
expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to the
coffee. When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the
professor said:
"If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up,
leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for you
to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your
problems and stress.
Be assured that the cup itself adds no quality to the coffee. In most
cases it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we
drink. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but
you consciously went for the best cups... And then you began eyeing
each other's cups.
Now consider this: Life is the coffee; the jobs, money and position
in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain
LIFE, and the type of cup we have does not define, nor change the
quality of LIFE we live.
Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the
coffee God has provided us."
God brews the coffee, not the cups.....
Enjoy your coffee
*"The happiest people don't have the best of
Everything. They just make the best of everything." *
*
Live simply.
Love generously.
Care deeply.
Speak kindly.
Leave the rest to God.
You are the miracle,
Your life either shines a light - or casts a shadow*.
I don't remember where I got this one but I thought it was note worthy.

RELATIVITY

One day, Timmy was talking to God.
"What's a thousand years like to you, God?" Timmy asked.
"Like a second," God replied.
"What's a million dollars like to you, God?" Timmy asked.
"Like a penny, Timmy," God replied.
"Hey, God," Timmy thoughtfully asked, "can I borrow a penny?"
"Sure," God replied. "Hold on a second."

True Story....

      Scientists at NASA have developed a gun whose purpose is to launch dead chickens. It's used to shoot a dead chicken at the windshields of airline jets, military jets and the space shuttle, at that vehicle's maximum traveling velocity. As such, it simulates the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl, thereby determining if the windshields are strong enough.
      British engineers, upon hearing of the gun, were eager to test it out on the windshield of their new high speed trains. However, upon firing it, the engineers watched in shock as the chicken shattered the windshield, smashed through the control console, snapped the train engineer's backrest in two, and embedded itself into the back wall of the cabin.
      Horrified, the engineers sent NASA the results of the experiment, along with the designs of the windshield, and asked the NASA scientists for any suggestions.
The NASA scientists sent back a three-word response:
"Thaw the chicken."

The following were actually taken from recent classified ads in newspapers:

AMANA WASHER $100. OWNED BY CLEAN BACHELOR WHO SELDOM WASHED.

SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE...ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS.

FREE PUPPIES...PART GERMAN SHEPHERD - PART DOG

2 WIRE MESH BUTCHERING GLOVES: 1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, PAIR: $15

TICKLE ME ELMO, STILL IN BOX, COMES WITH IT'S OWN 1998 MUSTANG, 5L, AUTO, EXCELLENT CONDITION $6800

COWS, CALVES NEVER BRED... ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE.

83 TOYOTA HUNCHBACK -- $2000

STAR WARS JOB OF THE HUT -- $15

FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 COCKER SPANIEL - 1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR'S DOG

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 YEARS OLD. UNPLEASANT LITTLE DOG.

GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs. NEUTERED. SPEAKS GERMAN. FREE.

FULL SIZED MATTRESS. 20 YR WARRANTY. LIKE NEW. SLIGHT URINE SMELL.

FREE 1 CAN OF PORK & BEANS WITH PURCHASE OF 3 BR 2 BATH HOME.

NORDIC TRACK $300 HARDLY USED. CALL CHUBBIE

BILL'S SEPTIC CLEANING "WE HAUL AMERICAN MADE PRODUCTS"

HUMMELS - LARGEST SELECTION EVER "IF IT'S IN STOCK, WE HAVE IT!"

GEORGIA PEACHES- CALIFORNIA GROWN - 89 cents lb.

NICE PARACHUTE: NEVER OPENED - USED ONCE - SLIGHTLY STAINED

FREE: FARM KITTENS. READY TO EAT.

AMERICAN FLAG - 60 STARS - POLE INCLUDED $100

TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR? WE OFFER PROFIT SHARING AND FLEXIBLE HOURS. STARTING PAY: $7 - $9 PER HOUR.

NOTICE: TO THE PERSON OR PERSONS WHO TOOK THE LARGE PUMPKIN ON HIGHWAY 87 NEAR SOUTHRIDGE STORAGE: PLEASE RETURN THE PUMPKIN AND BE CHECKED. PUMPKIN MAY BE RADIOACTIVE. ALL OTHER PLANTS IN VICINITY ARE DEAD.

EXERCISE EQUIPMENT: QUEEN SIZE MATTRESS & BOX SPRINGS-$175.

OUR SOFA SEATS THE WHOLE MOB AND IT'S MADE OF 100% ITALIAN LEATHER.

JOINING NUDIST COLONY! MUST SELL WASHER & DRYER $300.

OPEN HOUSE - BODY SHAPERS TONING SALON- FREE COFFEE & DONUTS

Real Signs

In the front yard of a funeral home, "Drive carefully, we'll wait."

On an electrician's truck, "Let us remove your shorts."

Outside a radiator repair shop, "Best place in town to take a leak."

In a non-smoking area, "If we see you smoking, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."

On a maternity room door, "Push, Push, Push."

On a front door, "Everyone on the premises is a vegetarian except the dog."

At an optometrist's office, "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."

On a taxidermist's window, "We really know our stuff."

On a butcher's window, "Let me meat your needs."

On a fence, "Salesmen welcome. Dog food is expensive."

At a car dealership, "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."

Outside a muffler shop, "No appointment necessary. We'll hear you coming."

In a dry cleaner's emporium, "Drop your pants here."

On a desk in a reception room, "We shoot every 3rd salesman, and the 2nd one just left."

In a veterinarian's waiting room, "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

In a Beauty Shop, "Dye now!"

On the side of a garbage truck, "We've got what it takes to take what you've got."

In a restaurant window, "Don't stand there and be hungry, come in and get fed up."

Inside a bowling alley, "Please be quiet. We need to hear a pin drop."

In a cafeteria, "Shoes are required to eat in the cafeteria. Socks can eat any place they want."

Master's Bouquet

The Master walked in His garden
Plucking flowers along the way;
He plucked two of my loved ones,
To add to his bouquet.

My heart at first was broken,
At the loss of two so dear;
But the tears I shed just washed my eyes,
So I saw His way more clear.

My Lord has a need for just this one,
For the pattern He has in mind;
But it's hard for the rest of us to see
Why we must be left behind.

Perhaps we are not ready to go just yet
We may need to ripen more
To reach the full blown fragrance
My Lord is waiting for.

To each, give forth a fragrance
To each we chance to meet
We should each be trying day by day
To make our fragrance sweet.

So I'm going to try my very best
To be loving and kind each day,
So at last I'll be counted worthy
To be part of my Master's Bouquet.

...Author Unknown

Adult Resignation

I have decided I would like to accept the responsibilities of an 8 year old again.

I want to go to McDonald's and think that it's a four star restaurant.

I want to sail sticks across a fresh mud puddle and make ripples with rocks.

I want to think M&M's are better than money because you can eat them.

I want to lie under a big tree and run a lemonade stand with my friends on a hot summer's day.

I want to return to a time when life was simple.

When all you knew was colors, multiplication tables, and nursery rhymes,
but that didn't bother you, because you didn't know what you didn't know and you didn't care.

All you knew was to be happy because you were blissfully unaware of all the things that should make you worried or upset.

I want to think the world is fair.

That everyone is honest and good.

I want to believe that anything is possible.

I want to be oblivious to the complexities of life and be overly excited by the little things again.

I want to live simple again.

I don't want my day to consist of computer crashes, mountains of paperwork, depressing news, how to survive more days in the month than there is money in the bank, doctor bills, gossip, illness, and loss of loved ones.

I want to believe in the power of smiles, hugs, justice, a kind word, truth, peace, dreams, love, the imagination, mankind, and making angels in the snow.

So....here's my checkbook, my wallet, my car-keys, my credit cards and my 401K statements.

I am officially resigning from adulthood.

And if you want to discuss this further, you'll have to catch me first, cause,

"Tag! You're It."

...Author Unknown

Dust If You Must

Dust if you must, but wouldn't it be better
to paint a picture, write a letter
bake a cake, or plant a seed
ponder the difference between want and need.

Dust if you must, but there is not much time
with rivers to swim and mountains to climb
music to hear and books to read
friends to cherish and life to lead.

Dust if you must, but the world's out there
the sun in your eyes, the wind in your hair,
a flutter of snow, a shower of rain,
this day will not come round again.

Dust if you must, but bear in mind,
old age will come and it's not kind.
And when you go, as go you must
You, yourself, will make more dust!

...Author Unknown