Leatherstocking Tales
Why Boot Camp?
Posted by HandsNHearts
11:10, Thursday, October 23, 2008 .. Posted in The Family Altar .. 1 comments .. Link
The tips and thoughts in the article shared are from Reb Bradley's site -- Family Ministries. Yes, he has some ideas that run much like The Pearls, and that tends to bring out the flames and arrows in folks, but think about it for a minute...11:10, Thursday, October 23, 2008 .. Posted in The Family Altar .. 1 comments .. Link
As the article says, if the military can take a rogue child without an ounce of proper training growing up and turn them into a respectful, functioning adult, why can't parents manage to do that?
Why do your children have to be 'independent' to the point of plain ignorance, arrogance and disrespect all the time? Why can't parents claim their children while young, and train them to behave properly while outside the home (as well as inside the home)? Don't say most do -- I walk through the same Wal-Mart's and other shops the rest of you do. I've seen the same children, some young and more sad, some over the age of 10, climbing in and out of clothing racks, running all over the store, playing with and grabbing at virtually everything they come near, yelling and talking disrespectfully to their parents, throwing fits when they dare to be told no for something, and worse, any store personnel who dare to correct them for their actions receives the same treatment. They ride bikes, bounce balls, totally tear apart everything in the toy aisles, grab everything off the shelves as they paw after food treats as though starved and they are a nuisance and sheeer annoyance to every other person in the store.
And the parents do nothing. Or they make very feeble attempts to plead and bargain with these children to get compliance on any level.
Why are parents bargaining with their children for proper behavior? Why on earth would a 20-30-40-something adult have to beg and plead with a child, offer deals or compromise their own ideas of behavior for a child so they an do as they please and disrupt the day of every other person they meet?
Plain and simple, what gives you the right as the parent of that child to allow that behavior out in public and disrupt my day? It isn't affecting your day -- you created that behavior and grew it up to where it is, but what gives you the right to inflict it on anyone else? Sure, that sounds arrogant of me to say I imagine, but we've all thought the same thing once or twice when confronted with children like that in a store. It's one thing to allow that behavior toward yourself in your own home, but don't you have an ounce of shame in your lack of parenting skills to want to hide the fact you have untrained, undisciplined, unruly children who think they deserve their own way all the time and demand it? I would. Shoot, I do. If mine act up like that, we push the cart to the front, apologize to the store clerk for thier having to place our items back into stock and we leave the store. Period. I have no right to make everyone else suffer the disobedience of my children. That's my burden to bear and my shame to repent of.
Have we really become a society where the children rule the world simple because we are too lazy?
Don't even answer that. I already know that answer without having to think long about it. Children do as they please because lazy parents have trained them that way. Every time you bargain to get your authority back, you create the monster of greed in a child. Every time you have to plead and beg with a child of any age to get them to quiet down or sit down or simply be still for a few minutes, you are building an arrogance in that child that festers until we have the teens and adults we have out there now. Unless they find fun or entertainment in a thing, they will not subject themselves to it. They feel somehow privileged because they breath air or something. The world owes them something. Sweeten the pot and maybe they will submit to it a little bit, but it's only going to be temporary and totally on their terms.
Why do we have to bribe children with treats, gifts and what-not to get them to obey even basic rules of proper behavior? Why do you have to bribe a child to have their room cleaned? It's their mess. They made it. Doesn't matter one bit that it's in "their room" -- it's a part of the family home and as such is still under the same rules. Bugs and rodents don't just live in one room -- they just start there. Why are we bribing children to behave while we go to the store for groceries? Don't they eat? Isn't it in their best interest, technically, to behave in that store so the food needs can be bought? Maybe you need to leave the shopping cart and go without groceries for the week and see if they decide it's better to behave for that brief time than to get their own way and go hungry without the treats and meals they demand. I know most parents won't do that -- they aren't going to limit their own selfish wants to make a point with the child. I'll wager their parents didn't either. It's called the trickle down effect.
Parents don't discipline because they can't discipline. They have no authority in their own homes. Television has shown children nothing but weak, insignificant parents and called it funny. They get in their groups at school and dismiss their parents with an ease no decent child should feel comfortable with. They have no conscience about talking rudely, disrespectfully or down-right hateful and wicked about their parents, their teachers or anyone else in authority around them. They do not have rules and guidelines in their lives and it shows in bright, glowing colors. Even if you don't see it, trust me, others who deal with the children do. Look around that Wal-Mart next time you're in there. There is a world of children from age 2 on up through teenhood who feel they have every ounce of power and authority -- and sadly, I suppose they do. It's been handed over to them by wimpy parents who don't want to rock the boat in their own home. They want thieeir children to have fun. They claim to be 'choosing' their battles, but in reality, they are 'choosing' nothing. They don't want to get off the phone to deal with the behavior of their children. They don't want to miss that football game or movie on TV to deal with their children. They don't want to get off that computer chat group to deal with their children. It's easier to give in and let them do wha they want. They want to be buddies and best friends with their children instead of the God-called, God-ordained teachers and true parents of their children.
So....(yeah, finally...) as we are having some of these same issues in our home, we are having Boot Camp here beginning Monday. We have to decompress and deprogram from the past month of chaos and upheaval here, and get down to the business of adjusting to Dad being gone for a time. I have to teach my children that rules are rules, period. They are not guidelines to be heeded only if their are fun. They aren't going to get out in the 'real world' one day and be allowed this sort of free-will, rampant arrogance they think they prize at home. They will never have job where they can come and go as they please, or skip altogether because they don't feel like getting up and getting there. They are not going to get to work and decided they don't want the task they have been assigned and simply wander off to do something more fun and entertaining. If they aren't schooled (and we have really slacked off there all month!), they won't even be able to complain about flipping burgers at McDonald's, if they can even get that job. They will not be able to provide properly for their own family one day and we'll just repeat the cycle over and over again for generations.
Gee, kind of like those wicked families where there was no Godly influence heeded all throughout Scripture.
I don't want that for my family and I plan to work hard to discourage it. If I have disrespectful children who grow into adults with that heart of disrespect, it's all on my shoulders. No one else will bear that shame except me. I don't want to stand before God one day and answer to all the times I allowed unGodly behavior in my children.
I'll post the Reb Bradley Boot Camp article in the next post...
Finally back online!
Posted by HandsNHearts
04:53, Wednesday, October 22, 2008 .. Posted in From the Desk .. 2 comments .. Link
My computer is fixed!04:53, Wednesday, October 22, 2008 .. Posted in From the Desk .. 2 comments .. Link
Maybe I didn't get a chance to share.
Last week, while online, something blew through my surge box -- it's a beast of a box that sits under the des and my whole world here around the desk area is connected to it, landline phone, computer, printer, sewing machine, etc. -- and poof...
The computer shut down. I rebooted it and, nothing looked out of the ordinary until I tried to log back online. It popped up hardware failure - no modem installed.
Grrr.
You know, of course, the warranty on this notebook just expired the end of September. Sure -- let's wait until it's all said and done, then blow up. Murphy's Law lesson #1 I guess.
I called around, I tried everything suggested to me, including finally installing the original disks and taking this thing back to the day I bought it. That didn't do anything either -- aside from clear out ever program and upgrade I had that didn't transfer over to the flash drive.
Double Grrr.
I finally took it to the computer geeks at the repair shop and prayed it wouldn't cost an arm, a leg, and some vital internal organs.
They called this afternoon. It was done. I headed back in to pick it up. Apparently whatever *it* was that blew through my surge box, it knocked out my modem driver and my reinstalling that stuff didn't pick it back up. Great -- I thought I'd be paying mega bucks for a new modem, as I gather it isn't a simple procedure to plop in another modem into a notebook computer like it is for a desktop. It's a bit more 'involved' with this thing.
But, they repaired my driver for the modem by installing something then reinstalling the modem driver itself and bingo...back online again. And, best part, it was under $50 for the whole works. Can't beat that. No, I wasn't about to buy another computer. We have a plan here and I don't want a new computer even if this one weren't fixed back up....what I want is our bills paid off and a life on the other side of debts again.
And my husband back home where he belongs.
I'm not silly and foolish enough to put that aside just for a computer. I love all the folks who visit here -- well, baring those 'anonymous' dogs here and there without the courage of their own convictions to give their name and stand behind their spewing and barking which they claim is so right -- but I don't love everyone enough to be concerned over a computer connection to the world. Naw, it's nice when you have it and it works, but I'm not losing sleep over it. Although, I did have fun teasing my husband about it all. He plays along so well.
A Saturday visit...Boot Camp 101
Posted by HandsNHearts
04:02, Saturday, October 18, 2008 .. Posted in Around the Homestead .. 7 comments .. Link
04:02, Saturday, October 18, 2008 .. Posted in Around the Homestead .. 7 comments .. Link
This hasn't been the most productive day around here. I mean, it hasn't been the worst we've ever had, but still, I know so much more could have gotten done. I did get a denim jacket, 3 dresses, 3 aprons, 4 pairs of bloomers, 4 sets of boxers and 4 kapps cut out for sewing. Lord knows when I'll get to the sewing part, but they are ready for me now.
Eldest son and Dad will be home this weekend. Eldest son wil be loading up his storage unit and he and his fiance (who's been staying here all month) will be heading back to Arkansas.
It's not nice to say, but I am so so looking forward to having everyone gone from here. We have had a hard time with Dad being gone, but honestly, we just haven't had a chance to adjust to Dad being gone from the family. The day he left to head down for this job, our friend/neighbor called with 'dysfunctional family issues' going on and their 17 year old son needed to come over her for a couple of days. Just what I needed. Like rocks in my head.
Dysfunctional family issues subside and then here comes son's fiance. She isn't remotely Plain or conservative or unworldly in the least. It has been one trial after another now. I'm living with attitudes that need serious deprogramming and a life that is about as upside-down as it can go.
I need time to get used to Dewey being gone. The children need time to get used to Dewey being gone. We just need time to decompress from the chaos we've been thrust under in the past month. Everyone is back-talking, everyone has made really poor choices as to what they need to be doing daily around here...no one has touched more than a lesson or two of schooling the past month. They are constantly arguing over things that are settled and carved in stone around here.
We need to regroup and restablish the long-running Rules of This House for everyone. We need a refresher course in proper attitudes, proper dress and proper direction of and from authority.
What we need...what we are going to have here...is Boot Camp 101. We are going to get back to the brass tacks of things. Basic and simple. No 'demoncratic style' whatsoever. I will speak, they will listen and follow directions. I will be assigning every moment of every day and some freedom will be given after a time of adjustment has been completed. No bathroom breaks, no talking without being spoken to first and directly, no drinks, no movement of even the tiniest little toe unless so directed and mandated by me. Everything will move along in an orderly fashion according to the schedule I set out daily.
Just like life in the real world here. You don't get to choose when you wake up and start your day. It's chosen for you by your job choice, and your employer. You don't get to choose what you wear. It's chosen for you based on the decisions this family has had in place for many years. You don't live in a hotel. You don't own a restaurant. Meal time is scheduled and those not prepared go hungry until the next meal. I don't run a short-order kitchen. Every single thing you do in your life is governed by someone else. That's how life works in this world, and that's how it will be working around here until we get back to where we belong.
Eldest children will receive the deepest punishment --
1) they know better. They have lived under the same rules their entire life. They know what is expected, what is and will be tolerated and what will not. They have full and total recall of all rules and consequences they have lived under for however many years. They are conscious enough to make their decisions and know full well wht will happen if those choices do not line up with the family standards.
And, 2) it all trickles down through the ranks. If the olders are brought back under subjection, the youngers don't have issues of authority. They see that it is simply how things work.
I will be the supreme power of life on this homestead until things are back to some sense of normalcy again. No more free choice/free will allowed. Period. I don't do the "this family is a democracy" mumbo-juumbo very well at all. Things are not gray -- things are either black or they are white. But never are they both. You listen; you follow rules and direction the first time you are told; you obey with a spirit of joy and a smile on your face; you put a full effort, 100% of your energy and heart into it. Afterwards, once this or that direction is followed and completed, you may come to appeal the priority of said direction. Give me a viable argument with sound research and we'll discuss it, and it will be taken under advisement for next time. But don't give me some sobby little whine and wimper rant about it. That's just a poor attitude and a poor plan of action. Save that tact with your boss at McDonald's/Wendy's/Burger King/etc., when you are flipping burgers for a living, lamenting your poor childhood and lack of direction and foundation.
We need this in this household right now. The sooner the better. Time to pray over the doorposts and anoint the corners of every room and push the spirits of the world back out to the curb where they belong.
Not sure WHY I was trying to start yet another blog?
What was I thinking?? I really don't know, even though it might say that I have two, for now I will only be posting on this one.I just spent about 10 minutes trying to find the perfect name for another blog, boy was it hard. There are a lot of titles that I would have loved to use but they were all taken, and then I thought why not try 6toads1princess, it surprisingly was not taken. However, I can not call my boys toads, so what made me think of that in the first place?
Well in the last week they have found several toads, and these toads sound like birds. They are the coolest toads. When I was little I lived in FL and I of course had a little sand pail. This pail was often the home to toads and frogs, but my Mom would almost always tell me to put them all back. She told me a few years ago that she always felt sorry for the one on the bottom, because he/she was usually half dead by the time I got around to setting them all free.
Tomorrow after I pick up my camera from Wal-Mart tomorrow I will share a few pictures that we took of the first one that they had found. He was played with for a little while but then quickly returned to where he was found.
Today as a treat we had Subway, I don't usually get fast food of any kind. But I was really in the mood for a sub. Since there is a Firehouse Subs anywhere close to us, Subway will have to do. It was really good considering it has probably been a year since I've had one.
The rest of the treat will be tomorrow when the children are allowed to have a glass of Coke.
Sometime at the end of December 2006, I happened to catch the movie Super Size Me on tv, and boy did it open my eyes. I decided that in January we would not eat out for the whole month, no fast food and I stopped drinking Coke.
The good news was we made it through the month, I stopped the Coke consumption and lost something like 21lbs. WOOO HOOO!!!!
Better yet was in March we were blessed to find out that I was pregnant with our first daughter. Princess was born 19 Oct and will turn 1 in 6 days, I can't believe how fast this year has gone by either.
So because of that movie, and moving out to the country so much of our lifestyle has changed:
we rarely eat out
drink Coke or really any sugary drinks
eat sugary snacks
drink things with red dye
listen to the radio-we do listen to music, mostly classical, hymns, and other uplifting pieces
we are working on limiting TV to just a few hours a month, including DVD's that are not school related.
I am sure that there are many others but those are all I can think of right now.
It is a family weekend, DH will be home for his first weekend off in almost 3 months. Because he drives a big truck he is always at work, then he also has Drill weekends and because of how they fell he wasn't able to come home every two weeks like normal. But this week he will be home on Friday-we are praying that it is early enough in the day that he will get to spend almost 2 and a half days with us. It is also a very special weekend as Thursday Prince A turns 10, and of course Princess turns 1.
So we will be cleaning like the cleaning service is here, to make sure that the house is nice for DH while he's home. There is a lot to do, not including the projects that I am working on. Part of me just wants to say lets just load up and go somewhere to really have fun with him, but then I know that he probably has a list of things he'd like to get done around here. It should be fun to see what we end up doing.
Off to get everything ready for the boys to get their school work done tomorrow. I am looking at possibly taking them into town for a 4H club meeting on Friday. I don't know that they are ready to do the work though. They have been very lazy with their school work lately and that concerns me. Probably has to do with me being lazy with my work, say a prayer for me that I am able to find my focus and get back on track.
God Bless.
Running around outside
The boys are all running around outside, it is twilight and they could careless. Last night they were all there past dark, running in circles around the tent that is set up in the front yard.We have been so blessed with the current weather, today it did look as though it might rain, but it never did. The clouds would cover the sun, and then the sun would burst through again to say hello, on and off all day.
I would have taken pictures of them playing outside but I still can't find the camera. I am so sad about that. There was something like 90 pictures on it and I hadn't copied them to the computer.
I am still praying that we will be able to find it though. I am going to call Walmart and see if perhaps someone might have turned it in. PRAISE THE LORD they have it!!!!!!!!! I will be going there to get it tomorrow. God is so good.
I think that I am going to work on my Nephew's blanket. I am crocheting it and I have two more scans of yarn left. Then I am going to start a blanket for Rachel, and a quilt for Caleb. Once I am done with those we are going to work on quilts for all of the older boys, but they are going to be the ones cutting their squares and sew the pieces together. Then I will probably do the actually quilting, they will get to try some I am sure.
Today is the day that I can't find the camera
Yesterday we went into town and got some pictures developed and while we were there I was going to look at what was on the camera and try to make a scrapbook page. Well I decided to just come back home and do it from here and just send it to the store.Only now we can't find the digital camera. I am a little stressed about this as the camera is only about 6 months old and I happen to like it. I am looking at getting a SLR Digital hopefully for Christmas, but until then this is the only camera that I really have.
I also was planning on posting some pictures here today as well. Off to look in the van, maybe I missed it.
Pray for me that we are able to find it and soon.
Photo's From The Pumpkin Patch
Posted by HandsNHearts
10:43, Sunday, October 12, 2008 .. Posted in Around the Homestead .. 6 comments .. Link
Ok...there are alot of photo's in this one, so bear with me if they load slow. We have an ancient dial-up connection here and trust me...they might load slowly for you, but that's nothing compared to uploading them on my end!10:43, Sunday, October 12, 2008 .. Posted in Around the Homestead .. 6 comments .. Link
First off, Saturday we visited a pumpkin patch with the handful of children from our church. No, we don't do the whole halloween thing at all. Honestly, you can dress a pig in pretty clothes and take him to church, but it's still just a pig and he simply doesn't belong there....still, we went. I'm a hypocrit, I guess.
The 'patch' was a large farm with several fields of pumpkins you could select from yourself (do you know how long it takes children to select their own pumpkin???? It's a loonnggg time, trust me!)
They had a large, inflatible slide thing, a race track set up with peddle cars and tricycles and such, a ring for pony rides, a few animals for the petting zoo and a hay bale maze in a small barn.
We played a short while, then took the hay wagon out to the fields and everyone got a pumpkin to bring home -- we'll be canning ours this week.
I'll just share the pictures and you can look around with our family...
Here's my group...sitting on top inside the inflatible bouncer slide...they are trying to decide who gets to be the brave one and head out first. There's Jacob, David, Matthew turned around backwards and Miss KatiAnne (and Hunter, our Pastor's grandson). I noticed that most of the 'city kids' waited very patiently while the strange "amish" children tested themselves here. LOL...what those poor folks must have been thinking! I know...we do need to get out and about more, don't we?The first ones out? Wild Child, of course...and Miss KatiAnne...
It was David's birthday and he was convinced the whole day was for him. The inflatible slide posed some issues for him, though. He simply doesn't have the weight to keep him on it -- he would bound over the top and begin to slide down, just to bounce most of the way down because it was more 'springy' than he was 'weighty'
And what happens when, as D at As Simply As We Can mentioned on her blog, when country goes to town?
The poor country children are duped by the city folk into milking a wooden cow....yes, apparently my children need to get out a bit more. I said that, didn't I? These are those moments when you do need a bit more of being 'of' the world and not just 'in' it I think ;o)
Here is eldest and youngest daughters, Miss Jennifer and Miss Emily. They look so impressed with the converted cotton wagon ride to the field, don't they? Honestly, Miss Emily about fell asleep with the motion of the wagon across those fields -- both on the way out and coming back in! It is a good picture of the two of them, though, even if Miss Jennifer didn't want her's taken.
And poor Miss Emily in the field...she was looking at me as though I had abandoned her to carry her pumpkin alone so I could take pictures of her misery. Note to other parents: Ok, I sort of did...but *Dad* wanted to see lots of pictures of the day...I had to be just a by-stander! He made me do it. It's all Dad's fault :o) Besides, doesn't carrying your own pumpkin, by yourself, across the whole field, promote character or something?She made it about 5 steps toting that pumpkin before she put it back down and said she was too heavy to carry it.
Here is KatiAnne with her pumpkin, Johanna with her choice, and way out there is Matthew, trying to help Miss Ashley from church select hers so he can help her carry it back to the wagon. Now, Miss Ashley comes from rather stout farm raised Southern stock...she really didn't need help carrying a pumpkin, but Matthew, well...always the gentleman :o)
After the pumpkin field, we stopped back at the farm kitchen and got some drinks before heading home. The children all played in the race track section. They had several different bicycles and tricycles and such.
Miss KatiAnne grabbed one of the large tricycles and took off -- with Abigail behind her telling her she needed to pick a different racer so her peddling wouldn't lift her skirt above her knees! She was right -- KatiAnne made about half a round on that track, with constant pulling on her skirt and apron, and chose a different ride. No one listens when Mom says to wear their bloomers.....
That was about it for the day. They had some huge, nice looking mum plants set out for sale...bright yellows, deep reds, oranges and some purple-shades. I almost bought a couple, but then I remembered the dogs...who would waste little time in dragging them off the porch; And the cats...who would waste little time in using them for a new litter box out there. They were better left where they were.
All in all, the day was fun for everyone. And I put gas in the van before heading out and paid $3.05 a gallon. Not a bad price, considering, but we get over to Blue Mountain and their gas was already down to $2.52 a gallon!!! I could have gotten 15 gallons instead of the 12 gallons I got for my $40. Ugh, ugh and ugh!!!! Still...all considered, the $3.05 was better than the $3.18 it was on Thursday, so I didn't suffer too terribly much. And those little 12 gallons was far more gas than my van has seen in a good 3 months now, so all was well.
A link for the goat shelter.
I hope that others will be able to use this shelter.I thought that it was pretty cool and cheap.
Blessings,
Debi
The cool night air
Tonight as I sat here working on the blanket that I am making for my nephew, I was again amazed by the weather that we've been having. It is pleasant during the day, it was up to 83, I believe inside the house, but when you went outside the breeze was cooling.We opened all of the windows in the boys room, even though they have popped out the one screen. I will have to get some more of the stuff that holds the screen in place tomorrow.
The crickets are making their music again tonight as were the coyotes. Tonight they did seem to be a little bit closer, it also sounded as though it was coming from a different direction. But they have stopped or moved on for now, I might hear them again during the night.
I saw on another blog a great little shelter for goats, that I am probably going to make for our two girls. We have Boer goats that are probably more like pets than farm animals. But they are currently on leads and BBQ got herself tangled the other day, making her foot swell up. But she is much better now, however it really makes me want to move them into a fenced area where they can both run and play. So I am going to get more T posts and some fence, might also run hot fence to make sure they don't get out. I think that they would both enjoy being able to run around and bonk heads.
I might also try this shelter once we have a milk cow. Just depends on how tall she is.
I tried to take some pictures of the children outside tonight as the sun was setting, but my little digital just couldn't handle the distance shots, everything was coming up blurry or just terrible. I am going to look for a nice SLR digital, I've got a great 35mm. Which I might bless my sister with. She is really into photography and has a great eye. Not sure that she would want it though, as just like me she would probably rather have a digital. We are all spoiled with instant photos. Off to ebay to see what it out there.
Blessings,
Debi
Cleaning the house
Today we've been cleaning the house. The boys are working in finding the floor in their bedroom, it is a sad affair. But once they are done we are going to sort the toys and only keep certain things. Then once the weather changes those toys will be packed up until next fall. They need to learn that they must take care of everything that they have.Right now Thomas is vacuuming the kitchen because one of my large baking dishes broke into ten thousand tiny pieces. Sadly this is one of those 10x15 glass pans. I had found them at Wal-Mart for 5.00 a piece, I am glad that I do have two others.
I am also looking to up grade our oil lamps, Deanna has mentioned that there is a place over by her that sells Alladin lamps for around 60.00. I might have her pick me up a couple before we meet up again. She is also working on some dresses for me and Rachel with a pattern that she has and has yet to give me. Perhaps she will have them ready next week and we can meet up in Tupelo. There is a new Barnes and Noble over there and it is so nice to have a real book store now.
I think that the boys and I are going to fix the riding mower tomorrow, maybe check and see if Walmart still has that push mower on sale and tackle this place.
Off to get something for supper.
Blessings,
Debi
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